6/19/08

Mercury to Fall

Mercury comes out of retrograde today. Not a moment too soon. Things will, hopefully, start to settle down, and we can alll get back to work.

I feel like I've been in crouching under a table waiting for a bomb to drop. And now I'm sore, stretching. Looking up to uncertain skies.

I was talking to my therapist last night about how, ever since I got sick when I was 21, and had doctors telling me "You might die tonight. We'll have to see." I've felt a tremendous responsibility to NOT DIE. Had the feeling that I have to WORK SO HARD NOT TO DIE.

(There's different kinds of dying, too).

But the realization that, whether or not I work so hard, it still might not be up to me, is rough.
Bombs still might drop from totally blue skies. These things happen. Will I feel better if I worry day and night about dying?



Today, though, feel like tap-dancing.

No comments: