Psychic But My Lyrics Are

Still recovering, I guess, from Friday night. Sister Pico and I went to an art opening in Brooklyn for this cool zine called Fake Orange. It was fun and everyone was wearing either black strappy high heeled shoes and/or a cape. I wish I had one but I had neither. My teeth were feeling weird. Then I met up with Jeffery and Cole in Hell's Kitchen at this bar Therapy. For real! To celebrate the first season of Jeffery and Cole Casserole. It was a lot of fun, obvi. I drank a lot of vodka and juices, too many. Then we all piled in cars and went back to Lady Rim's house, where we drank white wine and fresca (I don't know why) and smoke and ate potato chips while Cole sang along to Judy Garland. It was a lot of fun but I stayed up way too late and it made me sick and I think it really fucked up my li'l tooth socket.

Saturday I walked around a bit with Tommy and Paps but had to call it an early night and stay in. I just could not handle it! I forgot that I spent all week recuperating and then all of a sudden went ballistic. Stupid.

Sunday I got up early to go to Jiddy's stoop sale. Then I high-tailed it back up to wburg to the Gravy Train!!!! show. It was insanely hot out. I ran into Brontez and he whisked me to the band trailer where I drank a lot of beers and ate a lot of snacks and talked shit a lot.

Gravy Train!!!! are really important to me. I remember meeting Hunx when I was like 15? He lived just over the bridge from my town to Oakland in the Club Hott! werehouse where there would be realyl cool punk shows all the time. Like Erase Errata and Tracy and the Plastics for $3. Anyways, his legendary zine Puberty Strike was really inspiring to me and I also loved his band Panty Raid. He was always really nice to me and it was cool to see that you could be queer and a punk and cool and happy and survive and all that. He's like maybe four years older than I am, an age difference that is huge at 16 but less so now. I was internet friends with Chunx for a bit too, and getting to see Gravy Train perform (at Gilman, house parties in Oakland, anywhere) was always really cool. It's like being part of an in-joke. I think that's maybe the best thing about them. Their newer material is so insane, because the production values and beats are so slick. it was an awesome show and here is a photo of me enjoying myself in the front row:

That was fun. Came home to cool off some more. Monday morning I went back to the dentist to have them look at my extraction site from a week before. The socket is not healed, which is not good. I am also concerned that when they took out my tooth that my sinus is visible and that such communication (as it is called-- I'm learning so much about dental surgery) would never heal and I'll be stuck with a horrible sinus tooth socket forever. This isn't likely to happen-- and if it did it would take a very long time to develop. My immediate concern is that I am, you know, flying to Berlin on Saturday night and I hope I won't explode on the plane. But I don't think that's very likely to happen either. I am packing amoxycillin and codeine just in case. I still feel uncomfortable and then I feel scared because why do I still feel uncomfortable and then I feel guilty for being so scared because other people have real problems and then I feel really stupid for being so selfish and scared and then I feel like such a bad person that I probably deserve to have horrible things like dental accidents happen to me. This is one small section of what it's like to be me. The internet makes is possible to try to relay this experience.

But I also relay a lot of other experiences. There's a whole spectrum and I'm gonna get them.
I am moving forward with my life as if things are not on the verge of imminent collapse, because right now they are not. I am flying to Berlin on Saturday night arriving on Sunday afternoon (with a very brief layover in London). Sunday night, I am performing at PORK. Thursday night I am performing with La JohnJoseph at Chantal's House of Shame.

If you're in Berlin, please do come and say hi.


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