SOME THINGS WHICH JUST SO HAPPEN TO BE TRUE, LATELY:
- We do need new maps. I wanna find other ways to measure distances, how much we've put behind us.
- Everything is anxiety, so make it like water: realize it is composed of basic elements which we can recycle.
- And, really, now is the time. I was going to make a kind of storyboard of HOW BILLY SURVIVED WINTER, a Choose Yr Own Adventure novel or something. But then I realize the way I was measuring survival was like, a list of boys or something. Outfits I wore. Anyways the point is now it's spring and I've Made It, Miraculously.
- Being permeable. Being unrockable. Immaterial. It feels good / it doesn't feel like anything / it feels like you. It feels like how I imagine you to feel, and imagining how you feel is equal or greater than how you must actually feel.
- Symmetry sounds nice. It seems romantic or ideal. It is impossible and therefore seductive.
Been thinking a lot about that old SF band The Quails. Gosh, I loved them so much. Springtime for me feels like their music, cause in spring everything comes alive and then it's almost summer and in summer the Quails play a bunch of shows and you can hear the new songs before the record comes out in the fall. Worth mentioning, obviously, that they are worth getting back into since there is something of a nascent riot grrrl revival happening (or at least a wider discussion is taking place for the first time in ten-twenty years) and Quails lead singer Jen Smith (aka Miss Lady Hand Grenade, a stage name which had a profound effect on my life) was one of the founders of the Riot Grrrl thing, after saying to her friends in DC one summer that there should be, you know, a girl riot. Living Legend. Let's not get all the way into it. Also Julianna and Seth from Quails are now living in Portland and are playing on the upcoming Corin Tucker solo record. So, like, check them out. One of my favorite Quails songs, "More Gender, More of the Time" has a really awesome refrain: "The Quails are throwing a party for lovers!" which I always liked. Also on their first record, the song "Don't Do That", Julianna sings counterpoint to Jen, and while Jen gets all woo-woo in the chorus, Julianna just keeps saying "Young Lover!" and I dunno. That word, LOVER, is obviously a favorite. I notice it. I look for it. I root around for it.
Thinking a fair bit about, you know:
You want to find a more perfect union and I do not blame you. You want to be with someone who has the same damages as you. Who has matching scar tissue.