Today was Bring Your Daughter to Work day. The boss of the place I work brought his very sweet little girl in, and she had macaroni and cheese for lunch. So I was already thinking about Macaroni.
And then I heard that a short little story I had written a few months ago has been published in the new issue of Dossier Journal.
You know that scene in Me and You and Everyone We Know where the Miranda July character leaves that message at the end of her VHS tape which she sends to the curator at the museum, saying something like "If you see this, just say 'macaroni' and I will know you received this message." Something like that? And then the curator calls her and says "macaroni"? Gawd, that part totally gets me. Anyway, when I went to go get a copy of the magazine after work, I had a total 'macaroni' moment. Like: okay. Message received. Good. Great. I've been feeling kinda weird for a lot of reasons, insecure about my work/writing or whatever. I take any criticism (real or perceived) super duper personally. I've been really down on myself lately. And getting this story out makes me feel a lot better.
And I want to be really clear: what made me so psyched about this is not just that it got printed, it's that it was even considered to be in it. In fact, it's not just that. It's that when the lovely person who randomly asked me to contribute something asked me, I thought "No way." And then changed my mind. And I wrote this little thing and it took a couple weeks, and I really liked writing it, and I sent it in. And then I forgot about it, actually. But I was reminded today. And I'm really glad I didn't chicken out. I think it turned out great.
The theme for the section it's in is "The First Time". And it's about sex. It's a compilation of writing, pictures, and memories from various people about their first time. I wrote a piece about listening to Grace Jones. I'm beyond amazed by the other people featured: Miho Hatori, Cynthia Rowley, Richard Kern & Miranda July, among others. Such a trip. A really nice thing that made my day and I don't want to forget so I am logging it (web) here.
Walking up from SoHo with the big glossy magazine weighing me down I realized it was the first really hot day of the year. The first time I realized I was drenched in sweat after only walking a couple blocks. I didn't care. It had been stormy all day and at 6:30pm the clouds parted I swear to fucking god it was rainbow weather. I came home, went to the gym, cooked dinner. I started laying out the new issue of Scorcher the old fashioned way, with scissors and glue stick and guesstimations. Sitting cross-legged on my floor, listening to the Melvins album Stoner Witch. My back started to hurt so I am calling it a night. I'm gonna read that new Eileen Myles book Inferno in bed. I love it. It's hilarious.
Anyway. Macaroni. TGIF.