I've Been Sick

My new thing, this new comeback I've been thinking of lately is to say to someone, right after they've said something nasty to you, look them in the eye and softly smile and say: DON'T EVER CHANGE. It sounds like a compliment, but it's actually kind of a curse, in a sort of "zen" way, y'know? It's like saying "Never evolve." It's sort of mean, right? But it's a thing that whoever you say it to has to think about. I actually think it's kind of okay to plan awesome comebacks.

One time I was really stressing about running into this guy, who was friends with my ex. And they were both so obnoxious (this was a long time ago-- maybe they've changed). But I thought, "Y'know, if I run into that guy tonight, and he brings up my ex, I'm going to think of something awesome to say." And I thought something up, and I ran into that guy that night, and he totally brought up my ex! And I had this awesome comeback, and I said it, and it was great. It totally sounded spontaneous and the guy felt, probably, impressed by my wit. So it was worth the effort.

This morning in our meeting, we were talking about being afraid to take a stand. Being afraid to object, because of the repercussions. Like maybe people will agree with you, in private, but if you get punished for speaking out, then they won't support you anymore. It's a frustrating situation. Someone said that they've been noticing that across the board, in our culture as well. We've gotten away from the forms of expression of the 1960s and 1970s, those forms of consciousness and communication. And it affects the art that we make now. Or at least that was true of the art that this person had seen.

I do sort of think, you know, about how that is true. This being afraid to take a stand. That is new. Or maybe to just measure right now by an old tool-- of course it'd fail. Maybe being outspoken in and of itself isn't as crucial now as it was in the past. Maybe being able to not take a stand-- or as we now know, take all stands all the time, together, simultaneously, as if to erase them like with a black hole. Maybe that is the new way we should be measuring. So, basically, find a new way to measure right now so that it looks good.

And then tonight I waited to meet my cousin for dinner. She's my second cousin and was in town for a conference about the type of work she does which is in marketing. I was also meeting my third cousin, who just moved to New York to go to college, two weeks ago. While we were waiting for the second cousin to arrive at the hotel, we saw Cyndi Lauper walk by. Does she stay at the hotel? Doesn't she have a very nice and cheap apartment? Isn't that part of the myth of her?

When my Second cousin arrived we all went out to dinner and we were talking about speaking to people about marketing, and about art. I don't remember how it came up, but I told my Second Cousin that I didn't know a ton about marketing, but it seemed to be very "in" right now. It seems to be really cool to be into branding, per se. My Second Cousin nodded sagely. Of course it did. She said that her daughter was really into watching America's Next Top Model and at some point they always bring on a marketing person to talk to the girls about their Brands. I told my Second Cousin that I know nothing about branding. I told her that she must get this all the time, but I really don't have a brand. She smiled. I know that everyone's supposed to have a brand but honestly, I don't have one.

Sometimes I think maybe I was born without one. Who wants to be more consistent?

My Second Cousin laughed at the joke she thought I was making. We talked about art and about how artists sometimes have difficulty thinking about art and commerce together (I know I sure do!)

My Third Cousin who just moved to New York to go to college, two weeks ago said "Yeah, it's called Overjustification." Then we talked about how, for example, she's an actress, and in Theater there's such a thing as knowing your Type. You don't audition for roles that are against type.

I've been so obsessed with monk fruit lately. I found this kind of disgusting ice cream that's only 150 calories for the whole pint. The secret is a) it's not actually ice cream it's frozen whey protein and b) monkfruit. It's like a miracle food. What's it called?

A superfood.

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